If you are experiencing domestic violence or controlling behavior, your safety comes first. Whether you are preparing to leave, considering your options, or trying to stay safe in the moment, having a plan can make a critical difference.
This domestic violence safety checklist is designed to help you think through immediate safety steps, essential documents and items to gather, how to plan your exit, and what to do after you leave. Every situation is different—use the steps that apply to you and your circumstances.
Immediate Safety Steps
If you are currently living with an abusive partner or are concerned about escalating conflict, consider the following immediate safety measures:
- Identify a safe place you can go quickly, such as a trusted friend’s home, a family member’s house, or a shelter.
- Create a code word or phrase to alert trusted people that you need help without raising suspicion.
- Plan your exit in advance, including when and how you will leave if the situation becomes unsafe.
- Keep your phone and other devices fully charged whenever possible.
- Disable location sharing on phones, apps, and vehicles.
- Check personal belongings (such as purses and children’s backpacks) for location tracking devices.
- Check in and around your vehicle for tracking devices.
- If conflict arises in the home, try to stay out of high-risk areas such as the kitchen or bathroom, where objects can be used as weapons or exits may be limited.
Essential Documents and Items to Gather
When it is safe to do so, begin gathering important documents and items. If you cannot take originals, copies are helpful.
Identification Documents
For yourself and your children, try to collect:
- Driver’s license or state ID
- Passport
- Birth certificates
- Social Security cards
- Immigration documents
- Health insurance cards
Financial Information
- Bank account information
- Credit and debit cards
- Recent financial statements, if available
Keys and Access Items
- Home keys
- Car keys
- Storage unit or office keys
Daily Necessities
- Medications and prescriptions
- Glasses or medical devices
- Clothes and shoes
- Toiletries
- Comfort items and necessities for children
Electronics and Valuables
- Phone
- Laptop or tablet
- Chargers and power banks
- Jewelry
- Small personal valuables
- Sentimental or irreplaceable items
Planning Your Exit Safely
Leaving an abusive situation often requires careful planning. When possible, take the following steps:
- Pack a “go-bag” with essentials and store it in a safe, discreet location.
- Ensure you have reliable access to transportation.
- Change passwords on all critical accounts, including:
- Apple ID or Google account
- Social media (Facebook, Instagram, X, Snapchat, etc.)
- Online banking
- Phone carrier and account
- Consider requesting police standby if you must return to the home later to retrieve belongings.
After You Leave
Once you are safe, there are additional steps that can help protect you and establish stability:
- Notify trusted contacts that you are safe.
- Create a confidential, ongoing safety plan.
- Open a private bank account in your own name, if possible.
- Work with an experienced family law attorney to discuss:
- Protective orders
- Emergency custody or visitation orders
- Long-term safety and legal planning
Emergency Numbers to Save in Your Phone
If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
You may also find support through the following confidential resources:
- Maryland Network Against Domestic Violence: 1-800-634-3577
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
You Are Not Alone
If you or your children are experiencing domestic violence, help is available. Speaking with a qualified family law attorney can help you understand your rights, your options, and the legal protections available to you.
If you need immediate help, please reach out to local law enforcement or a domestic violence hotline. Your safety matters.